Last time I checked in, I had just gotten back from my trip to Nashville. I'd mentioned that just before my trip, I started having issues with hives. That continued after I got home. I think part of me will always be paranoid about the cancer coming back. But the hives really worried me, because skin issues were part of my pre-diagnosis symptoms. They worried my oncologist too, because Dr. Blau had me go get a PET scan three months before I was scheduled to. Luckily, my scan came back completely clear. Dr. Blau thinks my skin issues are a lasting side effect from the Bleomycin. That drug is known to cause skin problems, plus it also tends to stay in the system for a long time. I know Bleo can cause lung issues if you are given oxygen, even years after being administered. So it makes sense that the skin issues could last a long time, too. It's obviously very reassuring that it's not being caused by a relapse, but it's still frustrating to be so itchy all the time!
I'm also still dealing with neuropathy. It's mostly in my feet (half my toes are still numb), but my fingers and hands will "fall asleep" easily. Most of the time I don't notice it, since I'm used to it by now. But my feet become really bad when I stand for a long period of time. They swell really easily, and ache like crazy, to the point where I have to go lay down for a while.
I've been struggling a lot lately with the way I look now, my short hair being the worst of it. It's growing, but it seems like it's taking forever. It's about 3-4 inches long now but it's in dire need of a trim, and I'm doing everything I can to avoid cutting it. I feel like by trimming it, I'd be taking a step back. So instead, it's at a very awkward mullet stage, and I hate it. If you haven't seen my pre-cancer pictures, I used to have the most gorgeous, waist-length hair. I miss it like crazy. So I decided to invest in a to-die-for human hair wig. I had a couple human hair wigs already, but they were shorter, and I hate the cut and color of them. I wanted a "Victoria's Secret Angel" hairstyle. I wanted goddess hair. So I ordered a custom wig from a shop on Etsy. I was able to completely customize it, and it's gorrrrrrrgeous!
I'm so in love with it! The cap is full lace, and ended up being too big. But I found a way to make it work (if you have the same problem, check out WiGrip!), and it looks so natural. I get so many compliments on my "hair". And if you've ever lost your hair to chemotherapy, you know that warm and fuzzy feeling you get when someone compliments your wig. :)
(In case you're interested, the Etsy shop I ordered it from is "Gardeaux Wigs" and the owner's name is Rachel. She was fantastic throughout the whole process, and I highly recommend her!)
On the bright side, my natural hair is now long enough to pin the front back! :)
We just had some major changes at work, and I'm happy to report that I've had no issues with "chemo brain"! We switched CAD (computer-aided dispatch) systems, so I basically had to relearn how to do my entire job. But I've had no memory issues, thank goodness. I've been able to retain everything and haven't had a problem. I'm lucky, because a lot of survivors I know have had issues with "chemo brain," almost to the point where it's like a mild form of dementia.
I'm still traveling and going to concerts, and doing the things I used to love before being diagnosed. A couple weeks ago, I went on the Florida Georgia Line cruise. If you read my earlier blog posts, you know that this was the cruise that I missed last year because I started chemo just a couple weeks prior. I made it a goal to go on this year's sailing, and booked it while I was still going through chemo. Going on this year's cruise was my giant "screw you" to cancer, and I'm so happy to report that the trip happened. I did it. I survived and I made it onboard.
Last year, people were wearing purple and honoring me because I couldn't be there. This year, people were hugging me and congratulating me because I finally made it. People I'd never even met before came up to me and told me what an inspiration I was to them. It was a very emotional four days, but I had an incredible time.
One of the most memorable moments of the cruise was my meet and greet with Florida Georgia Line. The band had been instructed to shake people's hands since there was such limited time. When Brian (one of the members of the duo) found out who I was, he wrapped me in the biggest bear hug and told me how happy he was that I was able to make it this year. This is the same guy who wore a purple Hodgkin's awareness bracelet in my honor on the last cruise.
After the meet and greet was over, the realization of what had just happened hit me. I started crying as my friends and I were leaving the theater. I'm sure everyone around us thought I was tearing up because I'd just met the band, but it was so much more than that.
Exactly one year prior, my friends had stood with Florida Georgia Line for their picture. Instead of being there with them, I was at home battling cancer, and they had a photo of me to hold. I was a face on a piece of paper. This time, I was cancer-free and standing there where I should have been the year before. Even now, I'm getting emotional just thinking about what that moment meant to me.
I have a video that I put together of my entire cruise experience, so I'll post that in a separate post.
Last weekend, I flew to Boise to meet up with a friend to go to a concert. We saw a couple of artists from the cruise - Dustin Lynch and Chris Lane - as well as another one of my favorite singers, Tyler Rich. It was the best concert I've seen in a long time, and I really enjoyed myself. So much so that I decided to go see the same tour in Chicago in January with another friend.
I have a couple friends coming to visit tomorrow from California and Utah, so I'm excited to spend the weekend with them and play tourist in Seattle. Hanging out in the city never gets old, and I'm fortunate to live in a place that I love so much. Brie and I are also going to the Seahawks game on Sunday. Both friends are then going back home for a couple days, then we're all meeting back up in Las Vegas on Thursday. We're seeing Sam Hunt in concert, then spending a couple of days playing in Sin City. I'm also planning a trip to San Francisco in February to visit a friend. And of course I'm headed back to Nashville in June for CMA Fest. :)
You probably think I'm crazy for going on so many trips, but I'm having such a fun time going on my little adventures! A year ago I was banned from traveling, and missed out on so many things. So now I'm making up for last time. It sounds corny, but one thing that having cancer taught me is that I really do want to live my life to the fullest and not have any regrets.
Oh, I almost forgot! I'm getting my port removed on Monday! I'm not sure how I could forget to mention that, since it's such a huge deal, haha. This is the final step to getting back to normal. No more foreign object in my chest! I'll make sure I remember to blog about my experience getting it taken out.
Thanks for reading! Catch you in my next post (which hopefully won't be half a year from now)!
XOXO
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